RULES OF ENGAGEMENT
It was like stepping off the battlefield. As I sat on the beach, it was time to get a little honest with myself. I considered myself a pretty nice person and I genuinely loved God and most of the time, other people. But lately I found myself looking in the mirror at the end of the day and I wasn’t so sure I liked who I saw. Something was uneasy in my Spirit about the way conversations were playing out around me and I was determined to work out what was going on.
And as I replayed conversations and relationships, I began to see it and hear it. I had allowed sarcasm, negativity and criticism to become a natural part of my dialogue and the dialogue around me. I could see it was so much more than the words being said but that it was causing strife and silent damage to not only those on the receiving end but to my very own heart and spirit as well. And perhaps what saddened and confused me the most, was that this use of words, this negative use of words, seemed so common place around me now. We were speaking so carelessly to each other and so carelessly to ourselves as well. I felt heavy, trapped, suffocated and hopeless.
I was passionate about words and passionate about people. I knew words had the power to hurt others so when had I allowed myself to become so careless. When had I become so complacent about the friendly fire words, that I had given myself permission to speak or the permission I had given myself to stay silent in such conversations, without really considering the consequence.
Something had to change. I had to change.
“The tongue has the power of life and death” Proverbs 18:21
I had a choice – I could continue to allow my words to essentially speak death or I could choose to intentionally retrain my words to speak life.
I chose LIFE.
Words are powerful. When God speaks He creates life. Our God SPOKE and with His words breathed our very life into existence. We are IMAGO DEI – created in the IMAGE of God, a reflection, a carrier of the Spirit of God. This means that as we commune with Him, we too share in the power and authority within the use of our words. It also means that in every engagement with one another we should always choose to think the best and see the goodness, light, value and beauty in one another.
That day I saw that the enemy wants nothing more than to see the sons and daughters of God divided and paralysed. He knows that like that first fall in the garden, if he can disrupt the intimacy of relationship we have with one another, then he can also disrupt the effectiveness of the plans and purposes the Father has for each of us and us corporately. We have to wake up to how, by the disruption of relationship with one another, the enemy is subtly stealing the fullness of unity and community in our generation. God doesn’t mix His words when He describes it as “Gangrene” which literally means the body turning against itself.
Avoid godless chatter, because those who indulge in it will become more and more ungodly. Their teaching will spread like gangrene. 2 Tim 2:16
But once we are awakened to the reality that we are the living reflection of God in our everyday, we have to also be awake to the accountability that we have with the way we use our words in every single engagement we have throughout our day.
Every time we open our mouth we have the opportunity to reflect our Commander – in Chief. Our world, our children, our generation need us to be women who are awakened to the fight to speak life and light into every place and into everyone. Words in the mouth of a trained warrior are a skilled weapon. And when we are strategically positioned and commissioned by our Commander, BY HIS POWER, our words have the power to build kingdoms, speak life, cast down lies & deception, break chains, usher in healing, bring comfort, declare a hope and a future and bring Light into the places of darkness.
We have been called for such a time as this to be warriors who no longer speak inconsequentially and ignorantly.
Our generation has become complacent to understand the repercussions of their words – both online and offline.
But We are women who have to be vision carriers and culture settings.
In a world where we the computer screen allows us to feel as though we have connected with the world, we need to be women who will close the laptop, put down the phone and engage in conversation each other, face to face, eye to eye, arm in arm.
In an age where many women feel so isolated and alone, we need to be women who boldly step out of our comfort zone and become safe places with another by keeping what we share with each other sacred.
In a time when many women have been silenced by words that have hurt, damaged or targeted them, our Commander in chief has a strategic assignment for us
– We must Speak Once More!
And so will you join me and be bold enough to begin to SPEAK!
Will you be a women who is fully engaged to bring life and light into every engagement with others in your day?
Will you be bold enough to become a voice that will always seek to honour the Imago Dei within yourself and those around you?
Will you train up as a warrior woman, whose words are indeed weapons and who is acutely aware of the enemy’s schemes and cuts them down by the Word?
“For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart” Hebrews4:12
But a word of warning – to be effective in this battle we must first understand our Commander has some non-negotiable RULES OF ENGAGEMENT.
1) Train up your heart
Any warrior going into training must first complete a health check and primary to that is the condition of the heart. What is the condition of your heart? If we are to be a reflection of our Commander then this means to step into battle we must have the heart of Christ.
To be effective and shift culture we must constantly in check with the state of our heart.
“A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of” Luke 6:45.
We need to be uncompromising in the discipline and training of our hearts to be full of thoughts that only bring honour to our Commander. If we have bitterness, envy, pride, hurt, un-forgiveness, insecurity or agenda in our heart then our words will flow from these. But if we do the work of training our hearts and our thoughts to be full of kindness, mercy, encouragement, love, acceptance, goodness, forgiveness and when we chose to see the best in each other and seek truth, then we will begin to be ready to engage.
2) Retrain your instincts.
We’ve all been there- we are hurt by unkind words or by someone’s unfair judgement of us. Our natural instinct is to defend, retreat or attack back. But the rules of engagement from our Commander in Chief is to surrender our natural instinct and respond with our Imago Dei instincts.
This means
- When offended, speak words of forgiveness (Col 3:13)
- When criticised, speak words of encouragement (1 Thes 5:11)
- When accused, be silent and let Him speak for you (Ex 4:4)
- When others slander you speak generously with words of compassion and kindness (Esp 4:31-32)
- When found to be in a crowd that is loud with strife and criticism, let your whisper become louder than their shout(Prov 31:8)
- When you speak to yourself, understand you are speaking to one who is indeed Imago Dei. (Gen 1:27)
For when we use words that reflect the life giving nature of our Commander it cuts down the power of every other lie that comes our way.
I am determined to not waste one more day and one more conversation. Our generation needs women who will rise up and boldly speak. Speak with words that will give life. For there is too much at stake – there are futures to be released, there are relationships to be restored, there are identities to be established and there are hopes and dreams to be nurtured. Believe me there are truths to be spoken and life to be breathed.
1. In what places/ relationships in your life are you needing to rise up and speak?
2. What is He asking you to say?